The past few months of my life have been quite a trial. I lost the love of my life as he decided that we should part ways. It was extraordinarily painful. The man I truly believed that would be mine forever, that I would marry and have children with someday, was gone in a heartbeat. I do not believe these thoughts were naive. We were young, but our love was true, passionate, and strong and he too believed that we could be together until death. But we spent too long physically apart. We stumbled and wandered from our path, getting lost and separated. I was incredibly lucky enough to find someone else who understood my loss, and did not ask me to move on. Rather he gave me time, allowed me to express my pain while giving me his love, and accepting what love I could give him in return. He gave up an addiction for me. He kept me safe in his arms, night after night, always kind and caring. I learned to be happy again. Truly happy…something I had not felt in a very long time. Unfortunately, after a short few months, I made one mistake too many. I lost him. To lose two true loves in such a short period of time has brought a pain upon me that I cannot possibly describe. As you read this, I’m sure many of you will scoff, call me foolish. How can I possibly know what true love is at just 19 years old? How can I possibly have fallen in “true love” with two young men in such a short period of time? I will not deny that perhaps it seems unlikely. However I know it to be true. For I know when I truly love someone. I do not give such love to many. I have only truly loved few people in my life. And if these loves were not true, I would not feel the pain that I do at their loss. I am not asking for pity. I ask for nothing. I simply wish to have a place to express my emotions. My closest friends have told me to give up on regaining even his friendship. It’s been a long, dark two weeks since he spoke a single word to me, despite my deepest efforts to make things right. So, my friends, here I am. Alone and sad once again, I wish only for another chance, for one last attempt to show him that I truly want to make this work. I am immensely happier with him by my side and I really can’t express in words the terrible pain I feel without him. So wish me luck, tumblr friends. Help me find a way to show him that I deserve another chance…wish me luck..